Severus Snape's New Pet
by RebeccaRoy
Summary: AU Severus Snape wants a new pet and revenge. In Fact he sees exactly what he wants for a pet when he sees a certain Animagmus out for a walk one day…
1. New Pet

_Disclaimer:_

_I do not own the characters of Harry Potter, these belong to that wonderful author JK Rowling and the various publishing companies used to publish her works. I am however borrowing them, no not to make money but for fun and fun only. Only JK Rowling, her publishers, Warner Brothers and who JK Rowling says can make money and she has not given me permission for that, so no I do not make money off this, again it is for fun!_

_Summary:_

_AU Severus Snape wants a new pet and revenge. In Fact he sees exactly what he wants for a pet when he sees a certain Animagmus out for a walk one day…_

Chapter One: New Pet:

It was a beautiful day, Voldemort was dead, dead, dead! The shaggy black dog thought as he ran down the street enjoying his freedom. He could go about as a man anytime he wished but today he wanted to enjoy his freedom in doggy form. For of course this was not any ordinary dog, no this was Padfoot aka Sirius Black a one time convicted killer and twelve year prisoner in Azkaban the worst prison in the Wizarding world or perhaps all the world. He ran down the street happily, chased a few cats and was captured by the dogcatcher.

"Ere now ye large beastie I no' hurt you." The man in dogcatcher uniform said holding onto the other end of a long pole, the noose around Padfoot's neck.

"Woof, woof, yip!" Padfoot said his gray eyes going wide, how embarrassing to get caught like this.

"Now, now boy no one will harm ye, you should not be out loose like this." The man said as Padfoot tugged on the other end of the pole.

"Oh thank you, you found my dog." Came the voice of Severus Snape.

_Severus help! Take me out of here!_ Padfoot/Sirius said in his doggy language but all that came out was "yip whine, woof yip, yip!"

"Padfoot you naughty cur, what am I do to with you?" Snape said slipping a green collar on the dog.

"Normally I have t' take 'em in." The man protested.

"I assure you he will harm no-one, maybe get a few bitches pregnant but other than that he is just a lovable good dog." Snape replied.

"Well as this is the first time, you take 'em and donno let me see him loose again." The man warned him.

"Of course." Snape replied smiling.

He snapped a leash on the collar and with a sharp but not painful tug lead Padfoot away. Yes this had worked out well, he now had Sirius Black just as he wanted him, in dog form. Snape was Slytherin and he had planned the whole thing, getting Sirius to run out of the Grimmauld Place as Padfoot was not hard, just give the idea to the idiot Animagmus and there you go, it had worked out so well so far. It would be very funny when Padfoot tried to change back to Sirius, there was no way that would happen, not with the collar he wore now. Padfoot looked up at the potions master and could not for the life of him understand what was off about the man, he seemed strange to him. Then again Severus Snape was expertly clad in muggle attire, dark blue jeans, leather tunic over black tee shirt and his hair tied back from his sallow face. The only thing that could have given him away were his heavy buckled black dragon skin boots that his jeans were tucked into.

"Come lets get you to the vet." Snape said.

"Yip, Grrrr, yip woof, yip!" or translated _I bloody hell will not!_ Padfoot sat in the middle of the sidewalk.

"Okay then I will carry you." Snape said.

_What you cannot!_

Yet Snape could and did, he picked up the dog, put him around his shoulders and though he got a few very strange looks he did not care. A tall thin man carrying a large shaggy black dog was a funny thing to see, especally the look on the dog's face. Those that spoke to him laughed when they knew why he was carrying his dog, the dog did not want to go to the vet. Finally realizing he could not get away Padfoot relaxed and Snape sensing this put the dog down and let him walk down the stairs to the Underground and board a train. They traveled a few stops and walked up the stairs from a shabby station to the road above and walked to the vets office where Snape knew walk-ins were allowed.

"What can I do for you sir?" The heavily made up woman with the eyebrow ring asked at the desk.

"Do you have time for my dog?" Snape asked, "he needs shots and a bath."

_No shots, no shots, no, no_! Padfoot thought.

"Sure, there is time now." The girl said and seeing Padfoot smiled. "He is cute, how old is he?"

"I think four years old." Snape said. "I just got him, I want to make sure he is well."

"He is adorable." She said leading them back.

Padfoot found himself walked onto a scale and weighed then put on a table and he was not happy about this. Still he knew better than to snap or growl or bite, he did not want a muzzle to go with his new collar. Still he whined and whined and tapped one paw on the table when his temperature was taken and he really whined when the shots were given to him. They were not done with him, no not at all as he soon found out. He was taken to another room and here he was given a bath, with lots of scented soap and he was dried with a blow dryer until his fur was soft as silk. At least his fur was not shaved, that he would not take at all and Snape knew how far he could go with the Animagmus.

"Wow he is quite a hansom creature!" The girl who had washed him said.

"Yea he is that is why I got him." Snape said. "That and he is huge as well."

"Yea he is, gentle though, he has such a sweet face." She replied.

"Yes, he is going home to a good house and food." Snape said.

Padfoot looked up at him, he could not change back to human no matter how much he wanted to. He waited as Snape paid for the shots, bath and license and was led out of the vet shop and down the street and around the corner. Snape walked down an alley and after looking around Apparated with his new pet to the city he lived in far in the north of England. He stopped at a small convenience store near his home and got some dog food and lead the dog down the street to his home.

"A few rules Padfoot, you are not to chew on my furniture or try to run away, the collar you are wearing prevents you from changing back to human and has a tracing charm on it. You are to use the yard as your toilet not the house understood?"

"Woof!" Padfoot said meaning yes.

"Tomorrow we go to Petsmart to get you some good food and some chews." Snape said. "Now be a good boy and eat your dinner."

This last was said as Snape poured a bowl full of dog food for Padfoot and put it on a upturned rusted through cauldron and watched as Padfoot ate the food ravenously. He fixed himself some food and had his dinner then after washing up went into his small living room and sat in his favorite chair and allowed Padfoot to curl up by his feet. He had a new dog, for the time being and hoped that no-one found out what he had done for a long time. Revenge was turning out to be more fun that he ever could have imagined. Yes and Sirius Black was probably thinking he had not been a wise idea to head out of Grimmauld place as Padfoot that very day…


	2. Petsmart

Chapter Two: Petsmart:

Padfoot woke up and stretched all four limbs and yawned widely. He was sleeping on the floor near the dying embers of last nights fire, he sniffed and sneezed and he realized where he was. He forgot about the collar and tried to transform to his human form Sirius Black. His gray eyes widened as he remembered he could not and he growled in frustration, how long was he going to have to stay in his dog form? He padded outside, did his business and went back into the house just as Snape came down the stairs dressed much the same as the day before.

"Good morning mutt." He said to Padfoot pouring food into his bowl. "I will get you better today."

_You better this is horrible!_ Padfoot thought.

"I am thinking Petsmart ™ there is one here in town, I will take my motorcycle." Snape said.

_You have a motorcycle?_ Padfoot thought then wanting to go because he did not want to stay home he began to whine and prance around Snape. "Woof, woof, yip, woof!"

"Okay you can come, I have a side car, but you will be a good boy!" Snape warned him.

"Yip woof, woof!" Padfoot said.

So it was a bit later in the morning, after Snape had a nice breakfast, washed up and attached the sidecar with magic (hey he did have a garage so no-one did see this) he headed out. Padfoot was in heaven, the sidecar was comfortable and the wind in his face was delightful. The smells nearly drove him crazy as they rode into town. They came to the shopping area and Snape parked and lead Padfoot to the Petsmart™ with the red and blue sign and people going in and out with dogs and cats, some on leashes, many (the cats) in mesh carriers. He may not have liked Sirius the man but Padfoot the dog was really sweet and lovable and he was enjoying the well behaved dog.

"Oh he is a beauty!" A young woman who could not be much older than one of Snape's students said. "What is his name?"

"Padfoot." Snape said.

"He friendly?" She asked and got her answer as Padfoot licked her hand. "Oh what a love!"

"Yes I am very happy to have him, just got him, he is just the dog for me too." Snape replied.

She agreed and looked him over, tall thin man, did not get much sun but his dark hair and eyes made her melt. She took in his leather tunic, snug dark jeans and leather boots and naughty thoughts went through her head. She smiled at him and gave him a card, with her number on it smiling and Snape took it. Ah yes he forgot that one great thing about a dog, they could attract women and he would call her (yes he has a telephone folks) Padfoot was turning out to be good for more than just a pet it seemed.

_Ewe, someone with you_! Padfoot thought.

"Yes Padfoot there are those who think I am good looking." Snape smirked at the dog. "You are not the only, well you are not human are you?"

_I hate you, whoa doggies, bitches females, cats, food friends!_ Padfoot thought.

It was heaven in here for the dog Padfoot and wagging his tail furiously he looked around in wide-eyed awe. He felt a firm but not harsh tug on his leash and followed Snape who had got a cart and was now going down the isles where the dog food was. He loaded it up with mostly canned dog food and one bag of dry he would mix with the canned. He got a bag of chews and even some toys and a nice large fleece bed for his new pet. He nearly got a brush but thought that twice monthly grooming would take care of Padfoot, that is if he could keep him that long without someone finding out what he had done.

"There real food for you, you are a bit too thin mutt." Snape said to Padfoot.

_I am not!_ Padfoot thought as Snape checked out and paid for the food.

"He is so cute!" The cashier said to him, looking the dog then him over. "Such a good boy, here have a treat!"

_If I was human now we could go someplace quiet_! Padfoot thought.

Snape took him home and put the dog bed in the corner of the sitting room and put the food away. He then took out his wand (closing the blinds before he did) and charmed the broom, dustpan, feather duster and mop to clean the house while he set a cauldron on the sturdy kitchen table and began to make one of his potions. Padfoot yawned and did what most dogs like to do in the middle of the day (okay many humans including the author do too) he took a nap in his new bed. He stirred a bit in his sleep when the phone rang and Snape answered it.

"Snape here." He growled into it.

"Hi professor this is Harry Potter, I was wondering sir my godfather has not come back do you know where he is?" The boy on the other end asked.

"Missing?" Snape said doing his best not to laugh and to keep his voice at the annoyance level. "Mr. Potter you thought it wise to call me while I am in the middle of a complicated potion to ask about your godfather?" Snape growled into the phone.

"Sir I thought well maybe you knew something?" Harry asked.

"Try the pound, or jail, he has to be one of the two places." Snape snapped.

"Okay, thank you sir." Harry said and he hung up.

Snape hung the green phone back up on the wall and looked over at Padfoot who was snoring now and twitching in his sleep. Snape hoped he was having good doggy dreams and not nightmares of Azkaban, keeping an Animagmus as a pet could be complicated. He hoped Harry would not figure out what really had happened, he was of age now and the trace was off him and he was really, really good with a stinging hex, just as his mother had been. Snape groaned and sat down emotion stabbing at him as he remembered Lily, her beautiful eyes and dark red hair. Padfoot came over and put his head on his knee sensing his distress.

"You are better as a dog you know that?" Snape said petting Padfoot.

_You smell sad, why are you sad?_ Padfoot thought.

"I should not dwell on the past, she is gone and not coming back." Snape said looking down at the dog.

_I cheer you up?_ Padfoot decided that now was the time to chase his tail and Snape laughed at that.

"You insane mutt, I am not going to allow you to ever turn back, you are so much better as a dog." Snape said and Padfoot stopped cocking his head at Snape.

_I will turn back, just a matter of time, you will be a dead man boss… boss? No, no, no Snape not boss, me boss, me boss!_ Padfoot thought.

Snape patted Padfoot on the head and went back to his potions and Padfoot, flopped down near him but out of the way. Soon his snores could be heard through the house along with the gentle bubbling of the cauldron that Snape was tending to as he carefully added each ingredient as needed. Yes Snape was having a grand time with his new dog and he was never, ever going to give him back. Well he would do his best not to get caught is all…


	3. Malfoy Manor

Chapter Three: Malfoy Manor:

It had to be ironic that Padfoot's life was really very good. He had good food, a comfortable bed and even someone to play with, a man by the name of Severus Snape. Snape, a man he was suppose to hate, a man who even now was getting payback by keeping him in his dog state. Yet he was not cruel to him or mean, in fact he was very nice. Take the fleece bed he was curled up in, so warm and toasty and comfortable, Snape could have forced him to sleep outside and fed him the same awful food he had started out with but no, he gave him good canned food, chews to keep him happy and long walks.

"Ah good morning mutt." Snape said walking downstairs, dressed today in his black billowing robes.

_Not a mutt, I am a black Irish Wolfhound, at least I think I am._ Padfoot thought yawning and stretching, walking to the kitchen. _Where is my breakfast?_

"Breakfast is coming mutt, I have a treat for you boy." Snape said warming up the leftovers from the dinner he had had the night before at a good restaurant. "Here, now do not choke on it."

_Oh you are nice, _Padfoot thought sniffing the wonderful food and wolfing it down wagging his tail. _Good food, more?_

"I am going to see Lucius Malfoy today, he has dogs and I told him I have a new dog, he expressed his wish to meet you." Snape said sitting down to his breakfast of cereal. "You will be good, no growling at him or biting or fighting or you will be muzzled!"

_I will be good, I good wolf!_

Finally later that morning after Snape had finished washing up and doing a little dusting he took Padfoot with him through the floo. He made sure to put a shield charm on the dog's face and head, even so when he came out of the floo and used his wand to get the dust and soot off himself Padfoot sneezed violently several times. Snape used his wand to get the soot and dust off Padfoot leaving him dust free and smiled at seeing Lucius come into the room. He saw Padfoot and at once was on one knee carefully looking the dog over.

"Severus you have excellent taste, he is a strong boy, good bone structure." Lucius said gently examining the dog. "Rare eye color though, gray is not one I usually see in a dog."

"Yes that is what attracted me, and his personality." Snape said.

"He is a happy dog, good coat, could stand to gain a bit of weight, still you did good Severus." Lucius said.

"Thank you, are your dogs around, maybe Padfoot could play with them?" Snape asked.

"Oh yes, Maggie, Nellie come here you mutts!" He called.

At once the sound of running feet was heard and into the room came two large wolf hounds. They had gray and black coats and seeing Padfoot walked up to him slowly and circled him. They sniffed him and let him sniff them and a lot of information was passed between the dogs. Padfoot was in heaven, these were bitches and he was nearly drooling at that fact. What fun he could have! Yes Padfoot was intact and the females were in heat. A fact that Lucius dog man he was had not paid as much attention to as he should have.

_You smell nice._

_So do you, wanna play?_

_Hansom sister, very hansom._

_Yes, strong too, but not fully wolf._

_No I am not, man really, but now dog, the dark one's dog._

_You can be our friend, maybe more._

_Okay, we play?_

_Yes, come outside._

Snape and Lucius left the dogs together and went to get the work done needed. Snape had finally published several textbooks on potion making, from year one to seven under the name of Sam Thompson, yes very unoriginal name but there it was. He stood to make a good prophet from the books as these would replace not only Hogwarts potion textbooks but those around the Wizarding world. He helped Lucius finish up the contracts that would make him a very rich man and watched as the owls went to the publishers with his okay to publish. By that time it was lunch and he took it with Lucius in the breakfast room instead of the main dining room.

"You know Mr. Potter has been upset these past few days." Lucius said.

"Oh yes he called me, was asking if I had seen Sirius Black." Snape replied keeping his face and mind blank.

"Well he did as you asked, Sirius is not in either place." Lucius said. "Narcissa is giving me a headache."

"Hnn, is that because she really cares for him?" Snape said.

"Yes, she may not agree with many of his views but he is the last male relation of the Blacks and she would be worried." Lucius said.

"So it's his seed that she worries about." Snape said a smile on his lips.

"Please do not say that to her, she will hex you, badly." Lucius said.

"Speaking of which do you need any potions or anything for that last round?" Snape asked.

"Is it my fault that she is far too harsh on our son and I was just trying to stand up for him?" Lucius replied.

"Hnn," Snape said not daring to say that Lucius did spoil his son a bit too much.

It was afternoon before Snape had to head out. It was near the time he was going to leave when Narcissa came back after an afternoon of being with friends and shopping. Padfoot came in at this time with the Malfoy dogs looking very relaxed and content. Snape had a feeling what he had been doing. Narcissa saw Padfoot and he walked up and nuzzled his hand against her nose sending thoughts to her that he hoped she got. She studied him, from his coat and build to his gray eyes. There was something about him that was off but she could not place it, she must just be tired.

"A black dog, Severus you are so predictable. If you got a cat or owl or even a fish I would know it was yours because it would be either black or green." Narcissa said.

"Yes, but I did get him for his personality." Snape said.

"I can see that." Narcissa said. "His eyes, so gray."

"Yes, well I do have to go, potions to make, thank you for your time today Lucius." Snape said.

He bowed to Narcissa and threw some floo powder on the fire. He took Padfoot and once more went through the floo to his home. Once there he fed Padfoot and smiled, oh yes not even Narcissa had an idea who this dog was and he was going to keep Padfoot for a little longer, if not permanently. His life really had got very, very good as his one time enemy was now his dog!….


	4. Caught

Chapter Four: Caught:

Narcissa sat calmly drinking a cup of tea thinking of the strange dog that Snape had. The eyes were so… different for a dog, gray, but not just any gray, if she were not so practical she would have swore that they were too _human_ to be dog eyes. The name too was something she should know and as the realization dawn on her she put her cup of tea on the table. No, no Snape had not, Snape had not taken advantage of Sirius' ability to change to a dog. _A pure black dog with gray eyes._ Oh Merlin she had to go pay someone a visit and that person was at Grimmauld Place, a place she did not normally visit. She marched though the manor and found her husband dozing by the fire a book in his lap.

"Lucius wake up now!" She snapped.

"I was not sleeping." Lucius said waking up with a start. "Resting my eyes."

"Well stop doing that and come with me." Narcissa said.

"Bedroom?" Lucius said smiling at her seductively.

"No, we are going to Grimmauld place." Narcissa said.

"Now?" Lucius said.

"Yes now."

" But, but I was planning on reading this book tonight…"

"Your muggle TV game can wait." Narcissa said. "Or I can tell everyone you even have a TV…"

"Fine, we go by floo?" Lucius said.

"Good boy." Narcissa said.

So it was as Snape was finishing up his dinner and had fed Padfoot he received a letter. The owl flew down the chimney and dropped the letter at his feet and flew back out fast. All Snape really saw of the owl was that it was snowy white and had not wanted to be here very long. _What in Merlin's name was Harry Potter's owl doing delivering letters_? Snape thought. He read the letter and knew the game was up. He thought for a moment, but only a moment mind you of running away, with Padfoot but he was sure that Narcissa Malfoy would find him no matter where he went, even if it was to the end of the universe.

"Padfoot come!" Snape said.

_Where we go?_

"Back through the floo you mangy mutt." Snape said.

Snape threw floo powder on the fire and once more put a shield charm on Padfoot's face and head and called out Grimmauld place knowing he was quite possibly a dead man. He came out of the fireplace wand out and carefully got the dust off his robes and Padfoot and saw Remus Lupin in the room. He got down on Padfoot's level and looked him over carefully then satisfied that Padfoot had not been abused he called in Harry Potter. To say Harry was not pleased would really not do it justice at all, he was livid but managed to be polite as he faced Snape.

"Sir when I asked you a few days ago where Sirius was you said you did not know." Harry said.

"Yes that was in away true." Snape said.  
"You lied to me sir." Harry said.

"No, not really, I in fact do not know where Sirius is, I do however know where Padfoot is, had you asked where Padfoot was I would have told you." Snape said glaring at Harry, ye Gods he was dead.

"Take the collar off him now." Harry said.

"No." Snape said.

"You will please take that collar off sir." Harry said taking out his wand.

Now Snape knew if he dared duel Harry he would be facing the wrath of Mrs. Weasley and that he did not want. He removed the collar just as Narcissa Malfoy came into the room looking as cold as ice. Following her was a very unhappy Lucius Malfoy (unhappy because he was missing his game). Yet when he looked at Snape he smirked for he thought this was funny. Padfoot looked at Snape, grinned then turned at once into Sirius Black.

"Ah much better." Sirius said standing and stretching. "You are dead Severus."

"Is there a reason you thought it funny to keep my godfather a dog for a week?" Harry said.

"Payback, he was a great bullying git long after I stopped being mean to him." Snape said. "I merely wished to put him in his place."

"Yea you took me to the vet, had me examined, given shots and, and bathed!" Sirius said.

"I did not neuter you." Snape said.

"No but…"

"Or beat you."

"No but you…"

"Or make you sleep outside."

"What you did…"

"I got you a fleece bed, good food and even let you play with Lucius' dogs." Snape said. "I was more than kind to you."

"Well I guess I cannot stay mad." Harry said.

"No neither can I." Narcissa said.

"Well Sirius if Snape had wanted to truly hurt you well then you would have been locked outside." Remus said.

Sirius glared at Snape and he had his wand out as did Snape. They glared at each other for a few minutes and no-one spoke all that time. The house was very quiet as if holding its breath and then Sirius grinned. Then he threw back his head and laughed, this was the best prank ever! Oh and from Severus Snape no less. He had gone out as a dog oh yes he had and Snape was right, he had all the chances to hurt him but had not. Payback would come though but it had to be good, and he had to figure out what to do.

"You know Severus you are going to get it." Sirius said.

"Bring it on mutt." Severus said.

"Oh I will Sev, I will, just you wait." Sirius said.

"Hnn." Snape said.

"Oh and Lucius I think well, um I think I may have got your dogs pregnant." Sirius said.

The room went very quiet. Harry turned red at this embarrassment of those words, Snape looked as if he was going to bust a blood vessel or maybe laugh. Narcissa looked scandalized and Lucius thought his head would explode as he tried to work that out. He was not the only one who was not sure that was even possible…


	5. Sirius's Help

Chapter Five: Sirius's Help:

Snape sighed and looked over his house before he got ready to head back to school. The week he had had Sirius Black/ Padfoot as a pet had be a great week and he missed the shaggy good natured dog Sirius had been. He knew he was going to get it but it had been worth it in his mind's eye. He finished packing up his things and fire-called the school and Dobby answered.

"Can you have someone come get my things?" Snape said. "I am heading back to Hogwarts today."

"Yes professor Snape." Dobby said bowing.

"Thank you." Snape said.

He finished putting things in order around his house and finished tidying up before he headed out. He was getting ready to walk out the door when his phone rang and he went to answer it dreading who might be on the other end. He was most unhappy it was one Sirius Black and wished (not for the last time I assure you) the man was still a dog.

"Hey Severus how are you?" Sirius said from the other end of the phone.

"Why are you calling me Black?" Snape growled into the phone.

"Um I was wondering if your refrigerator was running?" Sirius said grinning on the other end of the phone.

"Yes why?" Snape said.

"Well you might want to go catch it then." Sirius said laughing insanely.

It was most unfortunate that he forgot that Snape was a very capable wizard. Because in a short second he found Snape had Apparated his hand through the phone line and slapped Sirius upside the head with it several times before he Apparated it back and hung up the phone a smile on his face. Sirius just laughed at this on the other end, the call was for one reason, he had to know exactly where Snape was so that the prank (well they said it was a prank) was to go off.

"Who were you calling?" Remus asked.

"Severus, the man cannot take a joke, he Apparated his hand through the line and hit me!" Sirius said.

"Sirius stop pranking him on the phone, this is the sixth time you have gotten slapped by him." Remus said.

"Oh but it was worth it." Sirius said grinning.

Snape did not think on what Sirius had done and if he knew that his hitting the man would cause this much trouble he would have hexed him instead. As it was he headed back to Hogwarts he had more on his mind than an insane Animagmus. He got back early and set up his personal things in his personal quarters and checked his potions stores for both the students and himself and then set about setting up the class schedules for the year.

By the end of the day he was looking forward to a nice hot bath in his large tub with a glass of red wine. He headed to his rooms, casting spells to take off the wards and he went into his chambers and at once knew something was off. Someone was in his bedroom and he had his wand out in a flash. He stormed in and saw something under the covers and lit up the lamps and stared at the very married Lucius Malfoy bedding his wife. In the potion master's bed. The said potions master turned very white with fury then red then white again a vein in his temple throbbing in anger.

"What the hell do you think you are doing in my rooms?" Snape snarled at the couple.

"Oh hello Severus, didn't hear you come in." Lucius said as Narcissa ducked under the covers completely giggling.

"This is my bed, my bedroom!" Snape snarled at them.

"Oh come on Severus, how often do we get to sleep in the head of our house's bed?" Came Narcissa's voice from under the covers between fits of laughter.

"It's not funny, and how did you get in here?" Snape asked still fuming mad. "I changed my wards the last time you did this."

"That was five years ago Severus, and you really should not have slapped Sirius, we got what we needed from him to get in." Lucius said now laying on his back looking extremely pleased and he was barely covered by any bedclothes. "Ah yes we always wanted to have some fun in these chambers but Slughorn would have hexed us into the afterlife."

"I really should, are you getting back at me for what I did to Sirius?" Snape said.

"In a manner of speaking yes." Lucius said smirking.

"But really we were bored and wanted some excitement and your chambers are so romantic!" Narcissa chimed in.

"Get up, get dressed and get out!" Snape snarled.

"Fine, but leave the room for a moment will you?" Lucius said getting up stark naked making Snape blanch, the man had the gall to strut around. "I don't want you seeing my wife naked."

"I will give you five minutes, if you are not dressed in that time you will still leave, naked or not!" Snape snarled.

He gave them four minutes then stormed in to order them out. Then he called for the laundry to come and get him clean bedclothes. He then headed out and Apparated straight into Grimmauld place to face one very dead Animagmus who had really go too far this time. Sirius Black was going to permanently become his pet that much was for certain this time around…


	6. Cross Country Fight

Chapter Six: Cross Country Fight:

Sirius was having a great day, he knew his prank had worked when Lucius had called him to thank him. Narcissa had sent him some sweets (as if that was wise him on a sugar high well that is not good) and so he was relaxing in the sitting room at Grimmauld place. That is until a very angry potions master showed up. In the middle of the room, without even politely knocking on the front door! Sirius took one look at Snape, gave out a very girly scream and Apparated the hell out of there. Not fast enough, Snape cast a spell (it's a complicated one so I will not bore you with it) and Apparated after him.

Ever watch cartoons where the villain and good guy/ protagonist are appearing and disappearing all over the place? Imagine this but in the real world, poof two men were in London then poof gone. All over England, Scotland, Ireland and the Isle of man. Every time Sirius thought he had Apparated to safety Snape was there to really scare him. Finally Sirius had enough of this.

"Severus stop this!" Sirius said backing from the newly Apparated upset wizard. "I swear I did not know they were going to use your rooms for that!"

"I am going to kill you." Snape said with death in his voice.

"Um Severus, mate that may not be nice." Sirius said wand out knowing he had not the least bit of hope with Snape in a duel. "What of Harry, now you could not do that, he would be so unhappy and you don't want to make him unhappy do you?" Sirius said trying for a winning grin. Of course it did not work, so to plan b. "Right, I am going, now bye!"

He Apparated straight to the gates of Hogwarts thinking that just because he once was a student there he could just walk right in. Yea right, that was not going to happen as he found the gates locked. The sound of Snape Apparating behind him made him turn very white. He turned to run and was tripped up by a tripping hex and he ended up sprawled out on the ground. He turned to face Snape and realized his wand was gone. Snape was holding it up a look of triumph on his face.

"Oh very funny, ha, ha!" Sirius said.

"You are dead." Snape said.

"No because I can out run you!" Sirius said.

"Oh?" Snape replied.

"Yea catch this!" Sirius said.

He turned into his doggy form Padfoot and raced off to the forbidden forest at full tilt. Snape calmly summoned a broom from the school and took off after him. It was easy for him to follow the doggy from of Padfoot because the tracing charm he used was for the Animagmus as a whole. He summoned from his rooms the leash and collar he had used on Padfoot before and continued on. He came to a clearing and dismounted from his broom as he saw Bane standing carrying a struggling black bundle of fur.

"Master Bane." Snape said bowing looking at Padfoot who was just smart enough to know turning to a man in the arms of a Centaur was probably not a good idea as said Centaur would probably get just a little bit violent. "I am sorry for this."

"Is this thing yours?" Bane asked him.

"Yes, he is sir." Snape said politely walking up and putting the collar back on Padfoot. "Bad doggy, upsetting the noble Centaur Bane!"

"Get him out of my forest!" Bane said shoving the wigging dog at Snape.

"Yes of course." Snape said.

He put the leash on Padfoot and tried to walk out of the woods with the dog. Padfoot sat down in the middle of the forest. Sighing Snape picked the dog up and once more put him around his shoulders. He carried Padfoot just fine until they got to the end of the woods and he was able to get onto the school grounds. Padfoot jumped down, tried to knock him over and ran away. Snape then took out his wand and did what he did not want to do to the dog that is he stunned him. He walked up to the now sleeping animal and levitated him into the school and to his rooms.

Sirius woke up confused for a moment as he was curled up in animal form in a nice warm doggy bed. He stretched and stood on all fours and tired to transform back to human form and realized that once more he was trapped as Snape's dog. He began to explore the bedroom he was in and growled at the green canopy bed with the Slytherin crest over it and green bedclothes. There was a human lump in the large bed and Padfoot jumped on the bed to wake up the owner of bed only to be hexed off. Snape woke fully and threw back the green covers to reveal sliver sheets and him clad only in a pair of black silk shorts.

"Morning mutt." Snape smirked at Padfoot.

_For Merlin's sake put some clothes on._ Padfoot thought.

"You need a bath, you smell bad." Snape said. "I will allow my elf to bath you, if you are mean to her she will tell me and you will be punished understood?"

_Yea fine whatever, give me food Snape man!_ Padfoot thought _I am hungry._

Snape went to take a shower in his bathroom and Padfoot followed to see how the Slytherin Head of House lived. The bathroom like the bedroom was large and like the bedroom the walls were of stone and had narrow windows that looked over the lake (the castle was on a cliff overlooking the lake so the dungeon could have windows) an hundred feet below. There was a large clawed tub, a good sized stone walled shower, toilet and sink. Of course the faucets were snakes heads along with the knobs but that should not have surprised Padfoot, the fixtures in the Gryffindor house were of lions.

Once Snape was done he dressed and went to speak to his elf. Padfoot saw she was a small creature that seemed a bit afraid to take care of him and he felt sorry for her. For her sake he would be nice and behave, as long as he got fed soon he was really hungry! Snape left and Tibby (this being the house elf's name) brought him a large bowl of wonderful scraps. This was mostly meat with gravy and some bread and cooked vegetables and Padfoot inhaled it happily.

"Master Snape says you to be good dog, he says there is a place you can use for your toilet but only that place." Tibby said to him.

_Fine, fine I will not use his bed and leave a surprise._ Padfoot thought.

"Tibby is to give you a bath, master Snape wishes this so Tibby must do this."

_Fine, get it over with._ Padfoot thought.

Meanwhile Snape helped himself to a wonderful breakfast in the great hall. This was the perfect time of year to enjoy the great hall, just before all the little brats came back from summer vacation to hopefully learn. Or in the case of trembling first years come the first time wondering what was to happen to them. He was a sadistic man in the fact he loved to scare the first years. He knew it was not nice but he could not help it, it was funny to him to see them look at him in abject terror wanting only to run away from him. No this was great, no students, the head table full of staff and lots of food to eat. Ah yes Snape enjoyed his breakfast very much.

He did not enjoy what happened after, he was in his lab working on some potions and he had just got most of them to the simmer stage when he got a message that Dumbledore wanted to see him _now_. He sighed, put his potions on standby and headed up to the headmaster's office. He was a dead man but he did not care, not this time. Black was going to stay a dog and that was all there was to it. He came to the gargoyle, said the password and went up. He knocked and was bid to enter and he did so seeing the headmaster calmly sitting at his desk waiting.

"You wish to see me headmaster?" Snape said innocently taking a seat across from the old headmaster…


	7. The Refusal

Chapter Seven: The Refusal:

Dumbledore looked at the young man calmly across from him. He knew he was going to have a fight on his hands, Severus was so very _stubborn_ at times. Still he had to take control of the situation as it had gotten way out of hand. He had received some interesting letters this morning about his head of Slytherin Apparating all over England, Scotland, Ireland and even the Isle of Man! It seemed he was chasing down a certain Animagmus and if the muggles had seen them... Well thank Merlin it had been night time when both wizards had done what they had.

"Severus did you Apparate all over England, Scotland, Ireland and the Isle of Man last night?" Dumbledore said trying so very hard to keep his face straight with no smile.

"Yes sir." Snape said, trying so hard to look innocent.

"Were you after a one Sirius Black?"

"Yes sir."

"Did you chase Sirius Black into the forbidden forest?"

"Not in a manner of speaking sir." Snape said.

"Oh?" Dumbledore said.

"I chased Padfoot into the forest." Snape said.

"I see, Bane was not happy about that you know." Dumbledore said.

"I will send over some oats, mead and chocolate." Snape said.

"That is not all, where is Sirius Black or should I say Padfoot?"

"My rooms." Snape said.

"I want him brought here." Dumbledore said.

"No sir." Snape said.

Dumbledore leaned forward and looked at the young wizard before him. Snape was not kidding, he had the look of defiance all over his face. When he got this way even Dumbledore had a hard time getting him to behave or do as he asked. He could threaten to take a rod to Snape's backside but he knew that would not work, Snape had a high tolerance to pain thanks to both Voldemort and Bellatrix. He could make him write lines but Snape would just sneer at that. Snape rose and Dumbledore knew he was going to go off yet again. Merlin he was a high strung young man.

"Severus." Dumbledore warned in his sternest voice.

"No, I will not, you don't get it Albus, he was a bully in school a horrible boy! More than once I had to come to the defense of some poor soul mostly from my house and save them! Black is horrible, it was he who egged James Potter and Peter Pettigrew on to torment me! The fact he is still alive annoys me to no end! It's better for the world he stays a dog!"

"Severus." Dumbledore said his voice getting more stern.

"He is a stupid idiotic, brainless…"

"Severus." Dumbledore said louder.

"Addle-minded, slimy…"

"Severus." Dumbledore said a bit louder calmly getting to his feet.

"No good, foul, wicked, torturing, brutal, uncivilized…"

"Severus that is enough!" Dumbledore said walking up to the young man.

"No mannered ungrateful, horrid…Owe let go!"

"No, now do I have your attention?" Dumbledore said calmly twisting the other wizard's ear. "Good, now bring Padfoot here now!"

"Oh let him have him for a week or two." Came the voice of one Remus Lupin.

Dumbledore turned, hand still on Snape's ear. He saw McGonagall by Lupin and wondered what was going on. Why would anyone besides Severus wish to keep Sirius in his dog form? McGonagall was looking amused as well and Snape knew it had to be because Dumbledore was twisting his ear off!

"Why would you wish to have Sirius stay a dog?" Dumbledore asked.

"Severus deserves his payback." Remus said.

"Black needs discipline, this will teach it to him." McGonagall said. "Besides he is such a nice dog."

"Very well, one week."

"Four." Snape said.

"One Severus."

"Four headmaster."

"Two, two is the most."

"Fine Albus, can I take him to class to test…"

"Severus you will do no such thing!" McGonagall said.

"Fine, two weeks, then you can have him back." Snape said.

"Don't you dare abuse him." Lupin warned him.

"I do not abuse dogs." Snape said. "He is safe with me."

So it was Severus Snape got one Sirius Black in doggy form for two more weeks. He was going to have to work on getting him longer but for now two weeks would work nicely. He headed back to his rooms and found a very clean large black dog sprawled out on his bed fast asleep. He ordered the dog off and Padfoot had no choice but to obey. Snape went to his private lab and began to finish his work. He smirked, this was going to be a fun two weeks. He had Padfoot back and Sirius Black could not bother him! What a glorious two weeks this would be, or more if he got his way…


	8. Sirius Black Has Puppies?

Chapter Eight: Sirius Has Puppies?:

Snape rubbed his temples and kept his eyes closed. This was not happening, it was not, could not be happening. He opened his eyes and looked up at Lucius who was looking down at him grimly. He had got special permission to even come to Hogwarts (he was on probation for his part in the last war, he had helped out so he was not locked up and had even become friends with the Weasleys, that is a long tale so I will not bore you with it). He was holding a wiggling two month old black puppy in his hands, four months ago (could it be four months already?) Snape had taken Sirius Black in as his dog when the man ran out in his Animagmus form one day.

"It's a cute puppy." Sirius said from the corner trying hard not to laugh.

"Its black, they all are." Lucius said evenly trying to keep his temper. "With gray eyes."

"I see." The headmaster said from behind his desk. "Well then congratulations are in order, Sirius you are a father!"

"I am going to kill myself." Snape said slowly. "I have heard a lot of things, have seen a lot but if this is true I swear I will kill myself."

"Well the bitches were so willing and as I have not had human sex for a long time…"

Snape blanched, he really, really did not need to hear that. He wondered what potions he had on hand that would offer him a quick and painless death. Maybe something Potter made would do the trick, yes a healing draught from that boy would kill him nicely. Snape felt as if he was going to overload mentally very quickly. Sirius Black, Lucius Malfoy and Albus Dumbledore watched him keenly to see what he was going to do. He got up and smiled brightly, not a good sign at all.

"Well it's been jolly good working for you Albus." Snape said bowing to the headmaster. "But I think I need an extended vacation."

"Whatever for my boy?" Dumbledore asked.

"This is insane, either that puppy is not Sirius and I am insane or it is and I am insane!" Snape was looking insane at this moment and yes he was cracking up.

"Severus are you okay?" Sirius said now holding the puppy.

"Oh dear he has lost it." Lucius said.

"Poppy up here _now_ Severus needs a calming draught." Dumbledore said.

"Yes I am insane! Good bye old chum Albus, Lucius you dear chap, mutt, this is the end!" Snape raised his wand to his temple.

It was fortunate that Albus disarmed him and Poppy came out with the calming drought and a straight jacket. The jacket fastened onto Severus and she poured the calming drought down his throat and carted him off to the infirmary. She was used to the staff cracking up at one point or another. Sooner or later a student would do something so stupid that a teacher would calmly walk from the classroom and try to jump off the Astronomy tower. Lucky wards had been set up so teachers could not off themselves in that manner.

"So is this puppy mine?" Sirius said. "Because if that is the case then we have jumped the shark."

"You know that did not make any sense." Lucius said.

"You don't know what jump the shark is?" Sirius said.

So Lucius and Dumbledore spent the next hour learning about what Jump the Shark meant and afterward they were still puzzled. Who would want to jump over a shark on water skis anyway? All this time the puppy got very contented in Sirius's arms and Sirius was hoping that the laws of magic held up in this case. Or new laws would have to be written and Gwap would not be happy at all.

"There is a way to test to see if the puppies are yours." Dumbledore said.

"Oh?" Sirius said.

"You will have to have blood drawn."

"Here you are Lucius." Sirius handed the dog back to Lucius. "Sorry did you say have blood drawn."

"Yes."

"That done with a needle?"

"Yes."

"Oh well in that case, bye!"

Sirius moved to the door but did not get more than one step before he was bound in silk ropes. He fell to the floor with a thud and Lucius smirked at this. Dumbledore took the Animagmus through the floo and deposited him on a bed in the hospital wing. Sirius howled in fear and begged Dumbledore to not let Poppy do this to him.

"Stop being a big baby." Poppy said taking what looked to Sirius a huge needle.

"No please I will be a good boy!" Sirius whimpered.

"Make sure you update his human vaccines too." Dumbledore said walking out.

Sirius begged, pleaded and Lucius thought this was very funny, until the needle went into his cousin and blood was drawn out. He fell very slowly backward and into a dead faint onto the floor. When he woke he had a sore head and arm and realized Poppy had vaccinated him as well. He sat up and wanted to know exactly what the blood tests revealed. Was Sirius Black a daddy or not?

"The puppies are not his." Poppy told them.

"Well then who's are they?" Lucius said.

"A regular old dog." Poppy said.

"Well splendid, better tell Severus then!"

"When he is feeling better." Poppy said. "He tried to jump off the tower again I am afraid."

"How long will he remained cracked?" Sirius said.

"I am going to kill you mutt!" Snape said from the doorway to the next room.

Sirius let out a very girly scream and took off running through the castle and very healed and ticked off Snape after him. Harry was in the library when he heard loud voices and he walked out to see Sirius run by then Snape after him yelling exactly what he was going to do to him. Harry walked back to the table he was studying at and sat down.

"What was that Harry?" Hermione asked.

"Snape going after my godfather." Harry said. "You have more ink?"

"Yes here, five galleons that Sirius is a dog until Christmas." Hermione said.

"Raise you ten its until New Years." Harry countered.

"Done." Hermione said.

The seventh years got back to studying as if it were normal that Sirius Black got chased through the castle by one irate potions master Severus Snape…


End file.
